For the Glory

I have found that in the past when we have dealt with struggles it is easy to go the "why me" route. We had a miscarriage with our first pregnancy and I about got lost in the bitterness that came from going that route. There was no direct sin or reason for us to lose that baby - it just happened because we live in a fallen world. No, those words don't help in the midst of the heartache and hurt. Honestly, for a while nothing really helped. I knew all the Scriptures, I believed all the Scriptures, but the hurt was too raw and too real at that moment to pull me out of my anger. Some of the anger came because I believe in God's power and sovereignty. I knew He could heal I just don't know why He did not. Those kinds of situations can really shake your faith. I struggled for months until finally God laid my options out clearly "you can let this bitterness continue to grow and destroy everything you have or you can trust Me in this and give it to Me and I will use this hurt in your life." That was my wake up call. The bitterness didn't help anybody or make that life lost any more valuable but God did. As I look back now I can see how God has kept His promise once again. No, He didn't heal that baby the way I wanted to see that baby healed but He did heal that baby. Then, He took the time to heal me and draw me closer to Him. I see how that stretched me to a point of breaking, but also how it grew me. I also see how He has used it in my life and in the lives of others, and for that I am thankful. I especially saw it when we heard about Addie. I was tempted to doubt again and start down the "why me", but God reminded me that He is my loving Father and He knows what is best. Since hearing about Addie we have been praying in a new way, a powerful way, and we are seeing God's hand move. It is awesome. But there is still the temptation to doubt so I have been studying healings in the New Testament of the Bible and today one hit me hard. John 9:1-12 tells the story of a man blind from birth that is in the path of Jesus and his disciples one day. The disciples speak out and ask Jesus if he was blind because of his sin or his parents’ sin. Jesus tells them "This happened so the power of God could be seen in Him." Then Jesus made mud, put it over his eyes, and sent the man to wash it off. After the man obeyed Jesus' instructions he could see for the first time in his life! The rest of the chapter goes on to tell how the blind man was drawn deeper and deeper into his faith through this and how he testified in front of the Pharisees who saw but didn't want to believe. This story hit me so hard because it summed up both of these experiences in my life. Direct sin didn't cause my miscarriage nor did it cause Addie's issues, but God is still God. In both of these situations He allows them for His glory. If I give these things into His hands He will use them to build His kingdom and that is my main goal in life. I want to see people come to know and love Jesus and to live in the freedom that He gives, but if I never struggle He never has a chance to shine. 2 Corinthians 12:9 tells us of God's response to Paul during a hardship “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me." This is one of the main reasons I share this about Addie. I want everyone to see how faithful God is, and it is through this trial that He gets to shine. Look at the healing power we have already seen on her heart and also her arms! God has gone into the womb where she is being knit together and healed what only He can heal so that His name can be praised! So we will praise Him for what He has done and praise Him for what He is doing. God has healed Addie and He will heal her completely of this I do not doubt. Though the temptation is there at times I have seen God be too faithful to not trust Him in His healing power. I am choosing to praise and not doubt because my God is faithful! The other reason I share all this about Addie is because we want others to join us in praying for the full complete healing we are waiting on.  Matthew 18:19-20 says "Again, truly I tell you that if two of you on earth agree about anything they ask for, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” There is power in the prayers of the righteous. When we call out to Him together He hears and He answers! He is going to get even more glory through Addie and I am so thankful to be a part of it!

Feet, Feet, Feet

I have been heavily burdened for Addie's feet today. So much so I can't sleep. I just feel the need to pray specifically for the healing of her clubbed feet so I am asking you all to join me. God has already worked in Addie's life, but I can't get over the feeling that He wants to do more and so I want to do my part to be faithful to Him and to be ever listening to His still small voice. How sad would I be if I missed a chance to witness another miracle in her life because I was too busy to hear Him leading me on what to pray. One of my favorite stories growing up was in Acts 3. It tells the story of a man crippled from birth who day after day came to the gates of the temple looking for handouts. Well, one day he got more than just a handout he got a hand-up. He begged Peter and John for change and they said to him "Silver or gold I do not have, but what I do have I give you. In the name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk.” Acts 3:6. The man got up and walked into the temple jumping and praising as he had never been able to do before. I have always loved that story, but today as I have been so burdened for Addie's feet I am reminded of the fact that the men here who claimed this power were the same as us. They were lost people who had made sinned in life, but continually turned back to Jesus a repentant heart and as they turned back to Him; they began to see more and more of His glory and power. Peter and John also were given more and more understanding. It didn't make their lives all rosy, but they walked with a purpose and the walked intentionally toward Heaven doing everything they could to pull others along with them. I want to stand in the confidence that they had when they told that man to stand. It didn't matter how long he had been crippled or why. They knew the God that they served and not only His love but His power. How much of God must we miss when we only look at one part of the picture of who He is. His greatness is more than we can fathom yet the deeper we dig into His truths, the more we see. He promises us that as we search for wisdom He will bestow it. This man had a healing because of the faith of Peter and John, That is what I am praying for Addie. I don't want to be content with a partial healing, if God wants to do the whole. Who am I to limit Him? Psalms 138 is a Psalms of praise and it ends with verse 8 claiming "The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, O Lord endures forever, do not abandon the works of your hands" The man at the gate was the works of His hands and Addie is also the works of His hands. We have already seen His special healing touch on her arms and heart, but we continue to come with praise for what He has done and faith for what He will continue to do. Our God is a God who is every deserving of praise. He is also a God who does what He promises to do. So we hold to that. We hold to the promise of James 5:15 "the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well." And we follow the instructions found in Matthew 7:7-8 “Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. ⁸ For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened." We are continuing in prayer for this healing and right now especially for her feet not because of lack of faith; but because that is what we are instructed to do. Holding on to the faith when the answer don't come the way we want or as soon as we want is the hardest part sometimes but the power comes when we learn to hold on to the truth that God is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow regardless of it. As we are learning more and more how to live off these truths we are seeing more and more answers to the prayers prayed in faith. So I leave you, hopefully to sleep now, with these verses of praise. Psalm 147:1 "Praise the Lord. How good it is to sing praises to our God, how pleasant and fitting to praise Him!" No one else could deserve our praise regardless and when we choose to praise through the storms of life, and we all have storms, we get to see the light as we pass through. Isaiah 43:1b-3a “Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.² When you pass through the waters, I will be with you and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.³ For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior;

 

 

Holding On

In the midst of waiting life goes on. Thoughts about Addie don't consume me anymore than other pregnancy yet like with the boys it is always there. This pain, that pain, odd discomfort is it normal? Normal pregnancy thoughts yet life goes on. I am still doing what I do. People bring up the issues more than I think about them on my own because I am so at peace. It almost seems odd. I am trying to do everything physical-wise to be cautious especially about adding to pre-term labor because I had that last time, but I am not worried. We are drawing so much strength and comfort from the promises of God that it doesn't feel odd to carry on like normal. I am not ignoring the issues Addie has but am fully at rest trusting that I serve a God who will do what he has promised to do. A verse that was mentioned twice yesterday really hit me Philippians 1:6 "being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ." God has started a good work and a healing in Addie and I am expecting Him to finish it. As  I wait to see this fulfillment I am amazed at the other ways I am seeing God in my life. This weekend we really debated our plans. Mike was supposed to go fishing and I was coming home, but for some reason we were really struggling with if we should or not. We decided to go ahead with our original plans knowing we would enjoy them. Since we have done that God has shown us in two distinct ways that this was where we needed to be this weekend. It is awesome how when we are looking for God's work it is so visible. I made another realization this weekend too. I am holding on to James 5:^{14 "}Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord.¹⁵ And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven." As I have shared before and I do believe this and that as we call on Him He will and has answered us. Mike and I are expecting and praying for a perfectly healthy little baby come December. I realized though that had it just been clubbed feet I wouldn't have felt the need to pray so desperately for healing, because it is fixable by doctors. But now with everything else the doctors saw we were made desperate and desiring. We desire to see God's glory in her life and we desire to see His promises once again shown true! We have fallen on our knees in front of God begging for the healing of our little girl and we have called on the elders and we have had her anointed for this healing, but as I have said before we can not just believe part of the scriptures. James 5:16 "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective." This verse tells us it is the prayer of the righteous that are powerful and effective. Our pastor in Indiana explained the day we got Addie anointed that this means right with God and right with others. If we expect God to do what He has promised to do we must live the life He has called us to live. I will tell you that before Addie was anointed I had to apologize to someone. Matthew 5:24 "First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift." I didn't want anything to stand in the way of God's power. I truly believe in the Word of God. He wants us to call on Him with our whole hearts for every issue. I think we may have missed out on His great power had it just been clubbed feet, but now I am anticipating seeing answers that could only come from Him because that is what He has promised us.The following verse leaves it clear for us. He wants to answer and is waiting to hear all we have to do is call out in faith. Call out in faith for whatever our struggles may be; be it salvation, healing, peace. God is waiting to hear for us so that His mighty power can be displayed and all the nations may see His glory! Isaiah 65: 24 "Before they call^(BS) I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear." Call to Him, bring Him your cares and He will carry them and you as He is doing for us. His love and faithfulness are everlasting. Yesterday at church there were testimonies of a little boy who had been anointed the same day as Addie who was thought to have a brain tumor and after the MRI there was nothing! The doctor was surprised but those who had stood in faith praying with them were not! There was also testimony of a 3 week old baby whose doctor had heard a heart murmur one week they got him anointed and the next week that doctor didn't hear it and the test didn't show it! God wants to heal! As we stand on faith in His word and His promises we are standing on the safest ground! It has nothing to do with us, but only with Him. It is because of His mercy that He cares about us enough to shower us with His love and power in our day-to-day life. So Mike and I will hold on as we go through this, and invite you to do the same. Look for His promises in His word. Turn your hearts to Him, ask any whoever you may need to ask for forgiveness be it God or others! Don't let something silly or petty hold you back from the great love and power of our God. He is our God because He called us and we came and He is calling you! 1 John 1:9 says "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." When you take the time to admit the wrongs you through God's grace become the righteous person talked about in James and your prayers are heard. The steps are easy and God is faithful as we have seen already in our lives and in Addie and as we will continue to see.  We are  going to praise for the big things and the little things because our God is worthy of praise! Our Addie is being knit together as we speak and I can't wait to tell of all the great things He has done and will do in her life! 

Good News!

So we went to the specialist again today to check on Addie's functioning, issues with the placenta placement, and cervical shortenings which could lead to preterm labor. We went in anticipating to see how God touched Addie and we were not disappointed! Previously, the doctor had thought that one of Addie's arms was stuck over her chest, but today we saw movement in that arm at the elbow, wrist, and in the fingers! Also, it was no longer over her chest! The other hand the doctor had thought her two middle fingers were stuck down into her fist, but on this arm we also saw movement at the elbow, wrist, and fingers. The fingers are not stuck down! The movement is not normal, but there is movement and that is a visible answer to prayer yet again. The doctor also said that because of this movement it is looking more likely that the issues are orthopedic and not neurological! The feet are still severely clubbed and the doctor still expects her to be in need of surgery within her first year. He told us that not to walk away thinking she was magically better but that it is good news. We are walking away knowing exactly that it was nothing magical but all spiritual. We are serving a powerful God! My aunt & uncle sent me a verse today that is an awesome reminder of who we are praying to and who we are believing in "Behold, I am the Lord the God of all flesh is anything too difficult for me?" Jeremiah 32:27. We went in anticipating to see God and we did. They may be moments when we want to doubt or question why only a little healing why not complete? Why us at all, but instead we will praise Him. My sister-in-law shared with me that today she was praying specifically that little Addie would wave at us and she did! God hears, God cares, God answers! God promises that "Before they call, I will answer; while they are still speaking I will hear" Isaiah 65:24. God has been faithful to us so if doubts try to creep in and questions I will remember who I am questioning the maker of Heaven and Earth, the King of Kings, the Lord of Lords! I will then say as it says in the Psalms"Put you hope in God, for I will yet praise Him, my Savior and my God." Psalms 42:5b. We are praising once again for visible answers and positive news about the health of our little girl. We are also continuing to pray for full and complete healing believing that God is who He says He is and that He will do what He has promised to do. He is faithful to us because of His great love and mercy and in that I can put my trust, my future, and the life of little Addie. She is one of His precious gifts to us along with her brothers, but He loves her even more than we do and how awesome that we are allowed to see Him knit her together piece by piece! So we continue to pray, we continue to hope, we continue to believe in His power as we draw deeper and deeper into His loving embrace and sustaining power. It is this sustaining power that every struggle we face can be handed over and let go of if we give our lives to Him. When we admit our sin and humanness His power is allowed to shine through brighter and brighter, and then we don't walk through this path alone! We are carried by our Savior and held up by our brothers and sisters in Christ around the world who have called on His name for their salvation and now call on His name for Addie. It is a powerful way to live knowing that even in the midst of it we are not alone. We are a part of the body of Christ! We don't have to know it all or understand it all. We just have to do our part and give ourselves completely to Jesus and He will lead. We go back to the specialist Oct. 9 and will find out more than, otherwise I continue to see the OB for regular check-ups every 2 weeks my next one being Wednesday morning. As of now though the placenta and cervix look good I am just suppose to take it as easy as I can with chasing 2 boys so that hopefully I won't go into early labor like I did last time!

'Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus

I have been learning more and more through this time about the importance of faith. We as Christians have said we believe that Jesus came and died and rose again because we are sinners. We believe that it is through His saving grace and awesome love that we can enter into a personal and powerful relationship with God the Father. We also believe that because of this God sends the Holy Spirit to convict, guide, and encourage us in our walk. This is all basic Scriptures, but this past week God has been showing me that if we claim some of the Bible is true then the whole Bible must be true. I have known this, but now I am getting a chance to live it out in a new way and it is stretching me and growing me.
Today we had a powerful time of hearing the testimony from Jon Fischer a missionary in Ecuador. He started out with a question "When is the last time you stepped out in faith so that the only way you could do what you set out to do was with God?" This question stopped me because it brought me back to the question I have been studying on all week. Do I really believe God will keep His promises and the answer is yes. James 1:6-8 "But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do."  If we don't believe there is no reason to pray because God can't honor a the prayer of a double-minded man. So we are stepping out in faith on the prayers we prayed last week and through this week of James 5:14-15 "Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord.  And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven." Many of us believe the second part that our sins have been forgiven but the first is harder to grasp. So now God is calling us to step out in faith believing for the healing of Addie. He has already touched her heart and I believe that He is knitting her together and she will come out perfectly whole.  I will praise God because Addie is fearfully and wonderfully made. God's works are wonderful, I know that full well (Psalms 139:14). I know His works are wonderful not only because He says they are but because He has shown Himself and His works over and over again. So I leave you with as song as we wait anticipating to see God's glory through His healing power in Addie's life.

'Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus
And to take Him at His word
Just to rest upon His promise
And to know, "Thus saith the Lord"

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him
How I've proved Him o'er and o'er
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus
Oh, for grace to trust Him more

I'm so glad, I've learned to trust thee
Precious Jesus, Savior, friend
And I know that Thou art with me
Wilt be with me to the end

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him
How I've proved Him o'er and o'er
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus
Oh, for grace to trust Him more